she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
