Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
