Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
