she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize