He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
