Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
