You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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