the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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