I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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