Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
