im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize