Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
my being single is dangerous.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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