I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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