I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
