Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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