he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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