I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
