So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
