I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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