You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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