i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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