you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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