So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize