got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
