pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
