I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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