I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
