I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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