Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize
