She went from zero to smokin in five shots
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
