Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
