Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
