I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
