ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
