Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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