i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
