We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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