I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
the day after is always just damage control
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
