He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize