Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
