Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
