She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I am full of burrito and curiosity
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
