in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
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