Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Randomize