Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I want her autograph on my taint
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
