It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize