so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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