What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Randomize
