I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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