no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
