arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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